In our seminars, when we ask the participants “What is trust?” there is a long silence as folks think of how to define something as esoteric as trust. When we ask how trust is built, they offer a bit more, but still with hesitation. When we ask how trust is destroyed, people answer very quickly — and vehemently! We may not know how to define it, but we know it when we see it...and especially when we don’t.
So, when do we trust someone? What four elements need to be in place before someone says to us: “Yes, I trust you” or even more importantly “Yes, I will do as you ask because I trust you”?
1. Credibility, demonstrated through knowledge of one’s chosen subject area as well as a history of delivering on promises;
2. Transparency, demonstrated by openly sharing motive and personal agenda;
3. Rapport, built through informal and non-directive interaction;
4. Common Focus, built through dedication to a shared goal.
Reflect on your relationships at work. Who do you trust, and why? Who trusts you, and how do you know they trust you? Which of the four elements have I neglected in my work relationships, and what can I do to build more trust?
What is trust? How to build trust? How to destroy trust?
I love the fact that you pointed out something I’ve never really thought about… We all know how trust is destroyed. That really is fascinating. Thank you for the post. Any tips for how to work for someone that has lost credibility?
Great question, David. The answer depends on how your manager lost credibility: Was it missed deadlines? Empty promises? Contradictory statements? Overriding personal agenda? Technical weakness? Something else? The degree to which you can rebuild trust for your manager will depend on what caused it to slip in the first place and how that directly impacted you. It also depends on whether or not other people know about or experience the same thing that you do. Has your manager suffered reputation damage that makes it hard to get work done outside the group, or is the problem relatively contained? In my experience, if there are no widespread reputation issues, then the folks on the team usually figure out some work-arounds to be able to get their work done in spite of the manager. It’s not especially efficient, but it can be effective.